The Fangirl Menace
by Flaxblossom
Summary: Boba Fett has escaped Tatooine and is back in business hunting bounties. His newest target, Astrid Mobok, holds something of a surprise for him... The unsavory news of imminent death at the hands of a terrifying creature from Earth! OC named Astrid, but don't worry, no OC x Fett love. Yuck. :P
1. Chapter 1

In this galaxy fondly known to Earthlings (that's you) as STAR WARS, we all know one thing for certain:

Boba Fett is by far one of the coolest characters to traverse the Galactic Trade routes.

So shall I honor him? Or shall I test his resolve with the most diabolical and twisted creature to ever be born? The second one. Duh.

And so! I give you:

* * *

_**The Fangirl Menace**_

_(star wars theme song starts playing)_

_The NEW REPUBLIC is in control, peace restored to the galaxy, happiness everywhere and butterflies prospering on Naboo. The infamous bounty hunter, BOBA FETT has miraculously survived the Sarlacc and scorching deserts of Tatooine. Now he returns to his ship and blasts off to new and dangerous encounters. He picks up a bounty on ASTRID MOBOK, a twi'lek girl who is rumored to have contact to a human living on the newly discovered planet EARTH. Obviously, the crime lords called the HUTTS want to control this newly discovered planet and have stolen a SECRET WEAPON from the Earth surface. Mobok knows about the theft, and so, must be quickly silenced. This, is Fett's mission...

* * *

_

Fett stood by his beautiful ship and patted her lovingly. Her batteries were all charged, the weapons all loaded, and the paint chipped to perfection, for it is a well known fact that no bounty hunter can have the same scary factor when his paint is pristine. Nodding with satisfaction, he turned and strode into the cockpit, seated himself in the cushy seat, and lifted slowly from the Anchorhead landing pad. He'd been given a new target , and he couldn't wait to get back into the game. But now was the part of the mission where he called into his 'employer' and got the details. Pulling up the screen for dialing their hologram, he realized he couldn't remember the Hutt's number.

"I know I wrote it down somewhere." He grumbled under his helmet, looking around for his handy dandy notebook. Every criminal needs one. "There you are." He snorted, pulling it out of the very bottom of the drawer and flipping it open. There, scrawled in the worst handwriting known to the Outer Rim were the words:

_Vetsoo the Hutt 1-800-555-0928_

Another victory for the bounty hunter! He punched in the number and waited patiently as his terminal rang. After the fifth or so ring, a big slimy looking face appeared with a smaller, obviously human face next to it.

"Achuta murishani! Jee-jee killya doe stupa cheeka weeteebah!" Chortled the Hutt.

"Greetings bounty hunter. We will kill the fool woman together." The human translator squeaked, looking like a toy next to the massive slug.

"There won't be any killing without pay, Vetsoo." Corrected Fett, leaning back in his chair. How he loved the cushy padding. So comfy.

"Ah! Gusha nek. Oto doe wermo. Creeda do. Doe mu-moolee?"

"Lucky man. I want the worm. Credits will be yours. The payment?"

"I want 3 million credits for this one."

"Foonta."

"Satisfactory."

Fett felt like that was too easy. "With half up front."

"Jee panwa da wanga!" Laughed the hutt loudly, holding his enormous belly.

"You amuse him." Mused the human. "Half up front is fine. The credits will be sent."

Vetsoo was still laughing when the screen turned off. Fett glared at it.

"What are you laughing at?" He grumbled, still feeling like that was easier than it should have been. Either the hutt planned on double-crossing him, or this twi'lek girl was worth quite a lot. Possibly both. With a sigh, he disappeared into hyperspace, his charts set for Coruscant.

* * *

She wasn't too hard to find. A death threat here, a shoot-out there, and he had her location. Strolling down the streets of Coruscant was fun, even for a murderous mandalorian like Fett. He had to stop and admire the new line of jetpacks Holster had just gotten in stock. They were pre-scuffed for the fashionable 'battle hardened' look. He'd buy one later with the hutt's money for a job well done. He got to the senate building and waited a few minutes. Right on time a short, slender twi'lek came running breathlessly up the steps towards the door. Too easy. He readied his dart gauntlets and shot her down. She dropped to the floor, a small knock-out dart stuck in her neck. A few people stopped and looked at her with raised eyebrows, then shrugged. This wasn't an uncommon occurrence on Coruscant. Some rope, a short walk later, she was loaded onto his ship and they were on their way back to Tatooine. He took a moment to examine her. She was pretty (what female twi'lek isn't?), not exotic however. Green skin, very common. Nicely shaped lekku though. She was slender and obviously a dancer, since she was wearing a black jumpsuit sparkling with white gemstones. Her eyes fluttered and opened, brilliant red.

"What th–!" She looked up and froze, her eyes landing on the well known helmet. "Boba Fett!" She gasped, then slumped. "Blast... I guess they really had it out for me, huh?"

"You could say that."

"It's a shame really. I didn't put up much of a fight."

"You didn't put up any fight." Corrected Fett, turning his head slightly in her direction.

"Thanks for rubbing it in." She snorted, wrinkling her bobbed nose at him. "You don't realize what's going on, do you?"

"Don't bother. I've heard it all before."

"No really!" She sat up earnestly. "I have a contact on Earth–"

"That's why you're here."

"–that told me what it was Vetsoo the hutt stole! We are ALL in danger, Boba."

"When did I say you could call me Boba?" Fett snapped, turning around to face her. "I'm getting paid 3 million credits to turn you in. You really think I'm going to listen?"

Astrid glared at him and leaned forward, her face inches from his. "Yes."

"Then you're daft."

"There's an off-shoot race on Earth that is feared even by the other humans. They're extremely dangerous when loosed upon the object of their... fancy."

Fett turned back to his ship controls, attempting to ignore her.

"Boba! They stole a... a..." She gulped, trying to steady herself. "A **fangirl**!"

_(to be continued)_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Last time on The Fangirl Menace:**_

_BOBA FETT successfully captured his bounty, ASTRID MOBOK, but has come to the chilling discovery that the SECRET WEAPON the hutts obtained from the EARTH is the terrifying creature known as a FANGIRL. With the fate of the galaxy hanging on a string, Fett and Mobok rush to TATOOINE in an attempt to stop the hutt...

* * *

_

Fett gripped the controls of his ship tightly in his gloved hands, watching the approaching planet with dread. Astrid glanced at him, looked away, then glanced at him again.

"What are you looking at?" He snapped, glaring at her venomously.

"You seem tense."

"You just said that Vetsoo has a fangirl. That's not the kind of news someone takes lightly." They landed in Anchorhead, sand billowing around the ship.

"No, I suppose not. But you're Boba Fett, nothing scares you..." She said, thin eyebrows pulled tightly together. "Right?"

"Right." He rolled his eyes under the helmet, then stood and grabbed his precious EE-3 carbine rifle, holding it reverently. As he walked for the door, Astrid cleared her throat.

"Well? What about me? Shouldn't I get a gun?"

Fett glanced at her, sighed, and tossed her the DE-10 blaster pistol from his belt. "Shoot only if I tell you to." He ordered, his finger pointed threateningly at her. "Understood?"

"Yes sir." Astrid nodded meekly, blinking big red eyes at him. Darn twi'leks... Always acting so cute... He shook his head and opened the hatch, walking out onto the sand, Astrid following closely behind.

Vetsoo was waiting for them.

"Ah, doe murishani... Chowbasa..." He hissed, licking his fat slug lips.

"The bounty hunter... Welcome..." Translated the skinny, pale human. Fett resisted the urge to snap the skinny neck. They were surrounded by thugs, and a large box sat next to Vetsoo as he slowly pet it. Creepy.

"Vetsoo... It was your intent all along to kill me once I brought you the girl."

"Maya nek! Jee dopa-meeky u. Kapa cheekta killee."

"Weakminded man! I double-crossed you. Hand her over to die." Spat the human. Fett rolled his eyes.

"I can speak huttese."

"Oh." The translator shuffled his feet, feeling stupid.

Fett stepped forward, his gun pointed at Vetsoo's forehead. "This girl is staying right here. I don't think you understand the destructive power of what you've stolen from Earth. If you unleash that... **thing**... on the planets, you'll be destroyed along with them."

Vetsoo laughed. "Koochoo. U meendeeya ama joka? Cheekta crispo kickeeyuna. No Hutts." He pressed the big red button on the top of the box and it slowly opened, smoke rolling out. Fett stood, frozen. He could hear heavy breathing, and his blood felt like it turned to ice as she stepped from the container. Her hair was pulled into a ponytail on the top of her head, broken glasses hung on the end of her nose, her body was skinny like she never ate, and a black t-shirt that said in bold white letters on the front, _All the Wookies say I'm pretty fly for a Jedi_. When her glowing green eyes landed on Fett, she emitted a screech so deafening and high-pitched, Anoobas for miles ran for cover. She lurched forward, her claw like hands outstretched, grasping on to Fett, smothering him, her iron like arms wrapped around his neck. Fett screamed in terror and tried to pry her off of him.

"Shoot! Shoot shoot shoot shooooooooot!" He howled at Astrid, who was fumbling with the gun.

"I got it! No–wait the safety is still on. Now I got it! Oops... I guess not. Is it loaded? Oh! There! **Now** I got it!" A well aimed shot knocked the womp rat from the top of the far wall. Or maybe not so well aimed.

"Darn youuuuuu!" Swore Fett as the fangirl drooled on him. Astrid, in desperation, clubbed the fangirl in the face with the handle of the pistol. With a howl that sounded like: "My beautiful nose!" The beast loosened her grasp on Fett and grabbed her face, lurching back.

"C'mon c'mon!" Astrid hurried, grabbing Fett's arm and stumbled with him back into the ship. Fett punched every button (and then some) to try and take off while the fangirl howled and screeched at the door. After a few moments of deathly silence, the two were safely out in space, flying over Tatooine's atmosphere. Fett turned slowly in his chair, sitting like a statue.

"You weren't kidding when you said the galaxy was doomed." He sniffed. Astrid just stared at him with horror, then slowly reached back and grabbed a cloth, carefully wiping the lipstick marks from the front of his helmet.

_(to be continued)_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Last time on The Fangirl Menace:**_

_BOBA FETT and ASTRID MOBOK managed to escape the evil clutches of the FANGIRL with their lives, but she is now hot on their trail in pursuit. Left with no other option, Fett is forced to go to YAVIN IV and ask the JEDI for aid. Will LUKE SKYWALKER listen to their plea? Or will they be sliced into Bantha bits by crazy Padawans...?

* * *

_

"How did I ever get myself into this position?" Sighed Fett as he watched Yavin IV approach. "I hate Jedi."

"How could you possibly hate Jedi? They're the good guys." Astrid said, her lekku twitching.

"Long story. I'd rather not get into it."

Astrid sighed quietly. "Right. You know... I've never met a Jedi. You think they'll be welcoming?"

Fett stared at her, trying to put words to his disbelief. Finally he cleared his throat. "I tried to kill Luke Skywalker on Tatooine a while back. I can guarantee Astrid, we will not be getting a warm welcome."

She blinked a few times, looked at Yavin IV, then slumped in the chair. "Oh... Peachy."

"Isn't it though?"

"Shut up."

"Touchy."

The radio crackled and a young female voice sounded over the speakers.

"Unidentified ship, you are entering Jedi Temple airspace. Please identif– Huh? Can't you see I'm in the middle of... Wait, what? You're sure it's Boba Fett?"

Fett and Astrid exchanged a glance.

"Boba Fett, you are about to be detained. Repeat, about to be detained."

"Hold it." Snapped Fett. "I need to speak with Luke Skywalker. We have a problem."

"What? You speak to Master Luke? Ha! You're kidding right?"

Astrid rolled her eyes and grabbed the mic. "Look kid, we're all in danger and Luke is the only one who can help. If you don't let us land and talk to him, the destruction of the galaxy is on your head. Capiche?"

The speakers were silent for a few seconds. Finally with a squeaky voice she answered, "Fine. We'll be waiting at the landing pad."

Fett smiled under his helmet. That went well. In fact, that went very well. He smiled at Astrid, although she couldn't tell he was smiling at her. In fact, she squirmed uncomfortably when he looked at her.

"You're kind of scary." She noted gently.

"I pride myself on it."

"Really?"

"Everyone can shoot a gun, but not everyone can strike fear into their bounties just by looking at them." He sniffed, smiling smugly.

"I can't shoot a gun." She pointed out.

"You're also not scary. Gunmanship is a very important aspect of life... Your parents really fell down on their job, not teaching you self-defense."

A sharp squeak met his accusation. "I was born on Coruscant to two very respectable Twi'leks! Just because I'm not some– some masked maniac doesn't mean my parents 'fell down on their job'!" She snapped, looking quite put out by his observation.

Fett snorted an amused sound (what's not amusing about a squeaking mad twi'lek girl?), then pointed out the window. "There's the landing pad. Let's be careful."

"Right." She grumbled, sulking in the chair.

* * *

They were completely surrounded by Jedi. Unhappy looking Jedi. Hormonally insecure teenage and armed Jedi. Fett didn't like it, especially when he saw Luke eyeing them suspiciously.

"Fett... What brings you and your..." Luke nodded to Astrid. "friend, to our Academy?"

"Galactic danger." Said Fett, always knowing how to put things lightly so others can be at ease. "Vetsoo the Hutt got his grubby hands on a catastrophic threat, and it's been unleashed."

"We barely got away alive, sir." Astrid added helpfully.

"The only way we can beat this thing is if you help us." Fett twitched. He couldn't believe he was asking Luke Skywalker (of all people) for help.

Luke nodded slowly as Fett talked, then crossed his arms all Jedi-like. "And what is this danger?"

"A fangirl sir..." Astrid whispered. Shrieks and gasps rose up around them, a few Padawans fainted, and Luke himself stepped back, aghast.

"How can this be?" He demanded. "I thought the Jedi had eradicated them thousands of years ago!"

"Apparently not all of them. Earth was untouched by the fangirl purge since it was in unknown space. And she's coming. Here." Fett warned.

Luke and Fett shared a look, then nodded. Luke held out his hand. "A truce then."

"For now." Growled Fett.

Luke turned back to his students and began giving orders, the defenses had to be perfect. Fett turned to Astrid and clenched his hands. "I hate Jedi."

Astrid consolingly patted his arm. The last thing she wanted was for Fett to lose his cool. They followed Luke through the vast stone hallways, past the vine covered walls, and up a flight of stairs. When they entered Luke's office, he beckoned them to sit down. He waited then until everyone was nice and comfy before he began.

"She will be stopped. I fear however the power of this fangirl. If they've been allowed to thrive on Earth, it may prove to be an untamable planet. How did she seem to you?"

"Terrifying." Fett admitted.

"Unfortunate. What about the twi'lek girl? I don't think I got your name..." Luke said, smiling at her.

"Astrid Mobok." She smiled back at him.

Fett cleared his throat.

"Do we need to worry about any slave masters coming after us when they see you're missing?" Luke asked carefully. There's just no good way to word that sort of question.

"Excuse me?" Astrid's nose wrinkled and she snorted. "I am not a slave. I work by my own free will in a very high class and exclusive restaurant. While the patrons dine in candlelight, the other performers and I do some song and dance, but nothing, nothing, like what those other dancers do. I do two performances per day and I get paid every other week." She narrowed her eyes at Luke. "I despise the stereotype that all Twi'leks must be slave dancers. I mean really..."

Luke looked embarrassed, which made Fett feel downright giddy. His mood restored, he leaned back smugly. "Can we count on your Padawans?"

"You can count on all of us." Luke answered. "I would suggest you both go and prepare. We've got a battle before us."

Fett and Astrid left then, going back to the ship, where Fett clipped on his full regalia. He eyed Astrid as she removed her jewelry and zipped the flight suit on over her costume.

"Astrid."

She turned and blinked up at him. "Yes?"

He tossed her the DE-10 blaster pistol. "We're going to go practice your gun skills." He mumbled, clipping his DUR-24 wrist laser on. "You're downright horrible."

She smiled despite his grumpiness. "Really?"

"Let's go." He snapped, turning to her, his mandalorian helmet reflecting the red lights from the control console.

_(to be continued)_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Last time on The Fangirl Menace:**_

_BOBA FETT made a temporary truce with LUKE SKYWALKER, both agreeing to kill each other another day. The FANGIRL is their common enemy now, and strategies are being made. Will BOBA FETT and ASTRID MOBOK survive? Or will the FANGIRL destroy them AND the JEDI?_

* * *

The Jedi coagulated together in front of their temple. Fett stood at the head with Skywalker at his side. Trees rustled in the distance, a flock of yellow Whisper Birds exploded out of the canopy, screeching and keening as they flew away in a panic.

Boba Fett clenched his jaw (though you'd never know). "She's here." He turned to Luke, his mini cape flowing dramatically in the wind. "It's time."

The mist cleared as the fangirl stepped out from the trees. As her eyes lit upon Fett and Luke, they began to crackle with an eerie green light. The following moments were a haze of screaming chaos, and Boba Fett quickly realized that they had vastly underestimated her. Many of the Jedi threw their lightsabers to the ground and ran, clawing at the lipstick staining their cheeks. Suddenly Fett was grabbed from behind in a rib-cracking embrace.

"Not... Today!" He snarled. "Taste Czerka ZX!" The scorching flame from his mini flame-thrower stunned her long enough for him to wriggle free. He rolled over onto his stomach and quickly scuttled off on his hands and knees. But not quite fast enough. A vise grip wrapped around his ankle and lifted until he was dangling upside down. As the blood began rushing to his head and the fangirls puckered lips drew nearer, he wondered... Was this to be the end? ... APPARENTLY NOT! Luke jumped in, his green lightsaber crackling as it sliced downward, barely missing her head. The fangirls eyes widened, fixated on Luke's thick, sandy locks. So she dropped Boba on his head.

"Go Fett! Save yourself!" Luke cried over his shoulder as he bounded away, the fangirl hot on his heels. Then Fett's vision blackened, and he knew no more.

* * *

Fett came to with a start as wet swamp mud finally soaked through his collar and onto his neck. After a frantic scrabble in the mud, Fett stood and noticed that it was considerably darker than it had been. The sun was setting in the East, marking that he'd been unconscious for at least a few hours. He had no time to panic! So he panicked and ran for the temple in search of Luke and Astrid. He searched for what seemed like a long time, hoping to find some sign of the idiot Jedi and the incompetent Twi'lek, but instead he heard ungodly groans coming from the room just ahead. The fangirl. Only she could make such a vile, unnatural sound. His finger rested on the DUR-24's firing button, suddenly realizing he'd dropped his rifle, and approached, intent on destroying the creature that was probably groaning because it had eaten too much. Namely Luke Skywalker. And possibly Astrid. Good Lord! Fett froze. It was like she'd eaten them for Thanksgiving dinner! Luke was the turkey and Astrid the pumpkin pie for dessert. And if Fett wasn't careful he would become the mashed potatoes! He shook his head, clearing away those completely pointless ramblings and went back to the task at hand. He stopped at the door, steadied himself, and then leapt in with lasers blazing.

"FETT!"

Fett froze in midfire, suddenly realizing that that was not the fangirl, it was Luke and Astrid, both staring at him with saucer eyes, the walls on either side of them smoking with laser blasts.

"Oh. Who was making that noise?"

Astrid glanced down at Luke (who looked pale and was leaning against her for support) and he pointedly looked away, instead lifting his right arm, which looked like a pack of Womp Rats had chewed on it.

"She got a hold of my arm. It's… Quite painful." He grimaced nobly.

"Where is she now?" Fett asked, kneeling down and examining the carnage that was once Luke's appendage.

"Astrid managed to lock her in one of our training rooms. She's right where we need her Fett, but she won't stay still!"

"Why? What could you do?"

"Freeze her in a hunk of ice empowered by the force and amplified by the crystals in there. She would be unable to harm anyone ever again."

"I see…" Fett's jaw tightened as he realized what he must do. Luke was too injured, obviously.

"This may be the end for me, then." He said grimly, his eyes locked on the horizon as the sun dramatically set.

"Fett… No!" Astrid said, supporting Luke against her body as he collapsed in pain. "You can't! There must be another way to defeat her. You needn't sacri–"

"There's no other way, Astrid."

Her red eyes filled with big wet tears. "What if you die?" She sniffled, hugging Luke tighter against her for comfort.

"Get used to it." Fett snapped, chucking her under the chin. "It wouldn't be the first time I died anyway." He stood then and slowly left the room. The fangirl was right where they needed her. Now, Fett would have to distract her long enough for Luke to fire the crystals. He felt his stomach clench at the horrible fate before him and he knew that even if he survived this, he would suffer the nightmars for the rest of his days.

He must… Kiss the fangirl.

_(to be continued)_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Last time on The Fangirl Menace:**_

_With LUKE SKYWALKER'S arm horribly MANGLED, our HERO has come to the horrible CONCLUSION that he must sacrifice HIMSELF to save the GALAXY. _

_Why doesn't ASTRID do it? 'cause she's a cliche female twi'lek, no fangirls for her. DUH._

* * *

Fett slowly walked across the hallway towards the impending door and his grisly doom. Alas, he was still so young and handsome!

"If only my father could see me now…" He sighed under his breath. He could just see Jango, sitting there, giggling, in some loungy blue shirt. Yes, he would be giggling at his son's fate and he would say:

"Haha! I only had my head chopped off! Youuuu have to SUFFER!"

…Thanks dad.

Fett realized he'd been standing there, staring at the door for a while. He turned and saw Luke and Astrid watching him intently. They gestured for him to go. He gestured back and Luke wrinkled his nose. Fett turned back to the door and reached, slowly, for the door handle. Slowly, quietly, silently he opened it and peeked his head in. He didn't see her. At first. The room was pitch black, save for the glowing blue crystals in a circle near the center of the floor. He had to lure her there, distract her, then… He shuddered, and spied her, sitting in a corner with something balanced on her finger. She was making a weird face too, then she- Wait… Fett stopped, his head sticking out the door awkwardly. Was she putting it in her EYE? What the force? She blinked oddly a few times, big fat tears running down her pimply face. Oh. The glowing green eyes are contacts. He began to enter the room, then once again paused. If she's wearing contacts… Why does she need glasses?

…

Some questions can never be answered. He entered the room. She sniffled, since putting in the contacts made her nose run, and noticed him. He stared at her. She stared at him. He stared at her. She screamed in joy. Fett recoiled and decided that maybe he _should_ just throw Luke to her and let her eat him like a Thanksgiving turkey. But alas! Too late! She had her arms around him and was petting his arms, his legs, his head… He pushed on her face in an effort to dislodge her.

"Back away from me, demon spawn!"

"Boba Fett I 3 you!"

He kicked her in the stomach and pried her fingers from his Wookie braids.

"Unhand me, foul beast!"

"Boba Fett I wanna have ur babies!"

He tackled her to the ground in an effort to reclaim the gun she had just snatched from him.

"Give up, you disgusting fiend!"

"Boba Fett, MARRY ME!"

He noticed a name tag that said 'Comic con. My name is:' and scribbled in garishly flowerly handwriting was a horrible sight. Mary Sue. He screamed in anguish. He really was doomed.

"Fett! Has she killed you already?" He heard Luke's muffled voice through the door.

"She's a far more powerful fangirl than we ever ima-!" He was soundly silenced when she tackled him and began pressing buttons on his jetpack. While they were scraping into walls and careening around she was singing a strange song about whole new worlds and princesses. Force, this creature was senile. After a few sound bruises she grew bored with his jetpack and took to playing with his other numerous gadgets while he lay faceplanted to the floor where she had landed him. He had no choice, it was now or never.

"Foul beast… Er… Creature from hell… Um… Mary Sue…?"

She froze in her movements and stared at him, her fat bottom lip quivering. "Yes, my love?"

He wretched, then gathered himself. And made a mad dash for the door.

"Let me out! I pray to all things holy! Have mercy!"

"No! You need to woo her!"

"Do not force this fate upon me!" Fett fell to his knees and banged on the door. "Astrid! You're a nice girl, open the door!"

"But Fett…"

"Open the forcing door!" He howled as the fangirl began skipping across the room to him.

"Fett, we have never been friends. In fact, we've always hated each others guts… But that's beside the point. We must all make sacrifices, and in these moments, I have come to see you as my true friend. We are brethren! All of us! Banded together against a common enemy, we have learned of each other and grown closer, a bond that can never be broken! She may be able to take your armor Fett, well, and your legs… And, your arms (she'll just rip them out like a mad wookie)... And, well maybe your life… And possibly your soul… BUT she can never take away our _unity_!" Luke spoke with compassion, feeling, and a few tears, pouring his little Jedi heart out for the Bounty Hunter.

"I… Am going… To kill you…" Hissed Fett as the fangirl dragged him back into the middle of the room.

"Hm… It was worth a shot."

Fett's life flashed before his eyes as the fangirl rubbed her cheek on his shoulder and… oh force… _purred_.

His first memory was his tube. Oh how he loved that tube. His father would come visit him sometimes on Kamino and tap on the glass and smile down at him. All the other boys got to leave their tubes before him though, and then it wasn't cool to be in a tube anymore.

Then there were those sparring matches with his dad. They both got a few scars from those, each sitting up with a bloody lip and laughing till their sides hurt. Good times, good times.

Then, there was that time on Geonosis where his father's head was lopped off and the Jedi tried to massacre little Boba. He managed to get away, but can you imagine trying to run from crazy Jedi when you're carrying all your dads armor? It's no easy task.

Then there was his first real bounty. Oh boy!

He was snatched from his memories when she began licking the front of his helmet.

"You, madam, revolt me."

She blushed and batted her eyelashes. "Oh Boba Fett, you are _sooooo_ sweet!" She squealed the last word and began pawing at his chest piece. He realized that he could wait no longer. He pried her off of him, then stood in the center of the blue ring of crystals and reached up. As his helmet began to slowly lift, the fangirls eyes grew larger, and larger in awe.

_(to be continued)_


	6. Chapter 6

_**Last time on The Fangirl Menace:**_

_BOBA FETT is ready to sacrifice himself to save the GALAXY. SKYWALKER and ASTRID wait outside the DOOR and HOPE for luck._

* * *

[Luke POV]

Astrid clutched Luke tightly as screams oozed through the door, whether it was the fangirls or Bobas, he wasn't sure.

"Luke! What's _happening_?"

Luke gurgled an answer through her death grip on his esophagus. "He's probably being maimed right now."

There was another shriek.

"Now he's being molested with fan love."

There was a short, curt scream, then a muffled thud.

"He… He…" All was eerily silent. "I think he did it." Luke and Astrid hugged each other tightly, tensely staring at the door.

…

**silence**

…

**silence**

…

**sile–**

"Skywalker?" A muffled voice whispered from further in the closed room.

"Boba!" Both yelled, relieved.

"I… Don't have much… Time left…" His voice sounded strained, and there was a sudden scuffle in the room. "But it's now or never."

"Are you clear of the blast?" Luke demanded.

"There's no time, Skywalker. Do it now!"

"Noooooooooooooooo!" Astrid cried, reaching out to the door, Luke's arm holding her back. He grimaced, focusing the energy into his right hand. Blue light began crackling around his fingertips as he aimed at the small blue crystal in the door.

"Then, this is goodbye…"

"Bobaaa!" Astrid broke from Luke's grip just as a bolt of blue light shot into the crystal and a large crack resounded throughout the temple. Deathly silence followed, accompanied by blue smoke billowing out from under the door. Astrid sniffled, and Luke pulled her close in a comforting hug.

"He knew the risks, Astrid." Whispered Luke.

She wept sweetly as all female OC's must. "But I've never met a more noble man! A more selfless soul! His memory will carry on in my heart forever. His influence in my life has changed me, inside and out. I am no longer the naïve twi'lek girl that stumbled into his trap, for I have now seen the darkness that corrupts this galaxy, and I shall not rest until every lowlife that plagues the universe is dealt with. For Boba's sake!" She shook her fist valiantly.

Luke sighed and pushed on the door, it was a little stuck. "Don't get ahead of yourself. He probably leapt clear, since he is, after all, the hero of our story."

Astrid nodded in agreement and helped him shove the door open, and they entered the room together.

The center of the room was concealed by a thick layer of blue smoke, so Luke and Astrid attempted to feel their way around.

"Boba?" Astrid whispered, before feeling something cold with her fingers. She stepped forward and grimaced when she came face to face with the frozen fangirl. "Good riddance!"

Luke turned to Astrid as he took a few steps forward. "Found something?"

"Yeah, the fangirl. She's frozen."

"Good. I'm sure Boba's laying around here somewhere." His toe bumped something and he turned back to look where he was going, and recoiled, for there, frozen eternally in a blue crystal, was Boba Fett, his helmet covering all of his face, save for an inch of his chin.

"No…" Luke whispered, touching the crystal. "But… How can this be?"

Astrid cried out when she saw Boba. "But he's the hero of the story! It's been told from his Point of View the entire time! Who will the story follow _now_?!"

Luke clenched his fist as he stared into (where he assumed were) Boba's eyes. "The story shall dissolve into oblivion." He paused as a thought occurred to him. "Or will it?"

_(__The End_ _of __**the Fangirl Menace**__)_

* * *

_Keep an eye out for the next story in the Trilogy:_

_Attack of the Drones!_


End file.
